Sometimes, I just want to give up. I simply want to seep away into the ground like a spring rain. Sometimes I am too tired to be “normal”, to function like a “normal” person, to not be too sensitive, to not need to be enveloped in supportive arms and words of support even when I do not deserve them. What do I fight so hard for? What goal do I have at this point in my life? I live the life of a teenager while trying desperately to be a productive adult because I am told that that is what I am supposed to do.
Depression is a liar. BPD is a liar, but I am too tired not to listen anymore.
Alas, tomorrow is a new day to begin the process again. Maybe I will find “normalcy” tomorrow.
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