When Lies are Sweet

Sometimes, I just want to give up. I simply want to seep away into the ground like a spring rain. Sometimes I am too tired to be “normal”, to function like a “normal” person, to not be too sensitive, to not need to be enveloped in supportive arms and words of support even when I do not deserve them. What do I fight so hard for? What goal do I have at this point in my life? I live the life of a teenager while trying desperately to be a productive adult because I am told that that is what I am supposed to do.

Depression is a liar. BPD is a liar, but I am too tired not to listen anymore.

Alas, tomorrow is a new day to begin the process again. Maybe I will find “normalcy” tomorrow.

“There are so many things that can make you feel stuck or disconnected. Relationship or family problems. Abuse or violence. Loneliness. Illness. Sexual orientation or gender identity issues. These feelings may creep up over time or come out of nowhere without warning.

No matter what you’re struggling with or how it’s emerged, there are real ways to plug back in—to get help and support 24/7/365 wherever and however you need it.”

Chat: Chat from 5 p.m.–1 a.m. EST (Monday through Friday) at http://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/GetHelp/LifelineChat.aspx.

3 thoughts on “When Lies are Sweet

  1. I was thinking as I read this about what takes more energy, ‘acting’ normal or being who you are, BPD and depression included. I’m actually inclined to believe that the mental illness takes much more effort than being normal. I hope that makes sense. But this is an excellent post because it identifies how so many of us feel at times. Oh and I love that picture. 🙂

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